Capo John And The Militia Travel to Splinterlands HQ Part 2


The post below is an epic adventure that rivals that of Lord of the Rings, the Hunger games and Game of Thrones put together. Film producers are bidding for the rights as we speak. The story begins with a vicious Somalian Splinterlands bot farmer called Capo John who vows to travel to Splinterlands HQ to confront the developers around their recent ranked battles update. His village is in danger so he takes action.

Read the previous two posts below to catch up

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Capo John and his trusty lieutenant Ganesh surveyed the land leading up to Splinterlands HQ. They were used to war but that journey across the lake wiped out 3 Toyota pick up loads of militia and they only had 3 more Toyota loads left. Deeplurker had frightened his soldiers so Capo John had to act. He took out his glass eye to drain the sea water out and popped it back in. The landscape including the trees were red. Something wasn't quite right. The same feeling he felt when he was attacked by Djinn Oshannus on the water. He saw his trusty parrot approaching from the distance.

News from home. He grabbed the note from his parrot and read that the new Splinterlands update was actually still quite rewarding for bots and all they had to do was change the code, rent some cards and maybe invest in a legendary summoner so there was still some hope for bots in this new update and the village would be thriving again.

Capo John still wanted to talk to the devs so he instructed his soldiers to ready themselves for the next stage of their journey to SP headquarters. This wasn't Capo John's first rodeo. He predicted more danger lay ahead after the surprising water splinter ambush. This red landscape only meant one thing. Fire Splinter lay awaiting in the long grass. Fire Splinter were known to be sneaky melee warriors with a big guy up top. He told Ganesh to set up flanking positions of their own. Capo would take the front man and maybe gain an extra ear on his necklace if the monster had one.
Capo scanned the horizon with his good/only eye. The one that worked gave him better vision than any soldier with two eyes. He gasped when he saw someone or something in the distance. There walking towards him was a big green thing that looked like the Incredible Hulk. Capo John laughed. A green ear on his necklace will be the talk of the village as Grum Flameblade approached very very slowly.

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Capo John's passion was cinema and he loved to mimic some of the fight scenes from his favourite movies. Even though the film "Troy" was panned by critics, it was one of Capo John's favourite movies. He loved the legendary warrior Achilles who was played by Brad Pitt. So seeing the very slow Grum approaching it was time from Capo John to burst into action and mimic one of the battle scenes from Troy. Achilles Vs Boagrius but now it would be Capo John vs Grum Flameblade.
"This guy is mine." smiled Capo John
"Ganesh you make sure that the Fire Splinter's sneak attack do not take me down first."
Ganesh scuttled away with a Toyota behind him.
"Serpintine Spy and that Tenyii Striker were lurking in the bushes waiting to sneak attack.

Capo John started jogging, then picked up speed then started into a sprint. He pulled out his trusty dagger mid sprint.


Meanwhile Ganesh and the militia took out the Serpintine Spy and Tenyii Striker. These monsters were sneaky buy Ganesh and the Somalian militia were even sneakier.

Capo John did exactly as Achilles did in the film. He sprinted up to the big green giant and stabbed him in the neck. Capo walked off with his hands held out while Grum fell down dead.

"ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?" shouted Capo John to the camera watching him in a tree.

Capo John also loved the film Gladiator so he was delighted with himself saying this line as well.

"The bigger they are the harder they fall." laughed Capo as he cut an ear of Grum and added it to his trophy ear necklace."

When Grum, Serpintine Spy and Tenyii Striker was defeated the rest were easily wiped out and they even skinned some kind of cat summoner called Yodin and ate him for supper in the bushes.

"Water and Fire are defeated" stated Ganesh
"What next is in store for us?" asked Ganesh who also took one of Grum's green arms as a prize.

There was a lush green field 100 metres before the headquarters.
" Earth Splinter " said Capo.
"A bit trickier but we are warriors."
"Let us rest here for the night and tackle this field in the morning"
"Pass me a cat drumstick Ganesh and give the militia the other 3'"
"They deserve some meat today."
"Something tells me more challenges lie ahead."
"Prepare the Toyotas. We will need them for Earth in the morning."

Part 4 to follow next week where Capo John comes up against Grund and some magic.


Awesome man. I loved that scene in Achilles!! Well shoed in!


The film went down hill from there though but I loved that bit.


Aye, it didn't half but that but almost carried it!