A series of haiku about the eagle.

Freedom
he seeks
to be himself.

Flying free,
it captures lunch;
satisfied.

"I will fly"
says the eagle,
"now and always".

Soaring
high in the sky
it's an eagle.

The eagle
gains a different perspective
every day.

This grand bird
powerful, all-mighty,
soaring high.

Tall and proud
the eagle lands knowing that
it can always fly.

These haiku were inspired by this metal eagle statue at the top of "Arthur's Seat" on the Mornington Penninsula, south of Melbourne, in the State of Victoria, Australia. Photo by @new.things, my fabulous adventure buddy.



0
0
0.000
28 comments
avatar

It's a beautiful haiku poem and it certainly expresses what the eagle might be.

Fly, fly away.Keep flying up so high...

0
0
0.000
avatar

Oh cool you went all the way there! Haven't been in years. Not since I was a kid!

0
0
0.000
avatar

We did! It was awesome. I had a dear friend to visit and the only way I could keep my client call AND see her was to hire a car... so we had to make use of the freedom of having a car, right?! !LOL

It was gorgeous. I looked across the water in that direction and thought "Riverflows is waaaaaay over there somewhere." 😉

0
0
0.000
avatar

What a view from up there! Oh yes I'm definitely on the other side!

0
0
0.000
avatar

"I will fly"
says the eagle,
"now and always".

Excellent haiku.. this one I really dig.. says it all for me. Hope your day is going well! 😀

!PIMP

0
0
0.000
avatar

Firstly, I like the structure and flow of the poem.
Each stanza can be seperate, but the harmony of them together provides the picture and weight.

I had to go check my memory of a haiku definition.
For me this doesn't fit with haiku as the general 5/7/5 syllable (well, on, but...) isn't there, nor the seasonal reference, nor the contrasting 'cutting' phrase in the 3rd line.

There is more of a resemblance to senryu with the theme, though again some elements are missing.

Hopefully none of the above gives the impression I didn't enjoy the poem. To confirm, it's great.

As it stands the linked stanzas provide a lovely overall effect and I would offer no suggestions for furthet drafts.

If you are considering further work on it then you certainly have the scope to make it a collection of haiku/senryu and I'd love to see that.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Ah, yes! Thanks for the reminder re. haiku. It would have been more correct to say "A series of short poems about an eagle."

Thanks for your kind words also. I really appreciate your genuine, thoughtful, value-adding reply.

Thus 👇

!LUV
!LOL
!ALIVE

☺️

0
0
0.000
avatar

I think most haiku these days actually don't include references to nature, both inside Japan and out. In the past 70 years they have moved to be more free standing short poems about anything. In Japan there is a strong traditional crowd that still follows the old rules (or at least the 1950 revisions to those rules) but the free-verse variety gains more popularity every year. I promised @consciouscat and @mell79 that I'd write some articles about how to make haiku and I will get around to that. If time allows I'll put one up tomorrow, actually.

0
0
0.000
avatar

I can't hardly wait. I am still trying to understand the basics of creating haiku, and I still need to learn and polish them more before I create one if I am satisfied with the outcome.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thanks, David. I appreciate this clarification.

Your article: I'll have to look out for that one. You're welcome to tag me somewhere in it if you 1. see this in time, 2. remember, and/or 3. wish to do so!

0
0
0.000
avatar

These are all wonderful haiku!

!PIMP

0
0
0.000