LOLZ Weekly Joke Challenge - Help Build A Hive Based Joke Database and Earn $LOLZ

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Week 9 Of the LOLZ Joke Challenge Is Here

Welcome to our 9th LOLZ Joke Challenge where you can share a joke you know and help us build our joke database for use with the LOLZ token. Our last challenge was awhile ago so we hope everyone has lots of jokes stored up to share.

The Tasks

  • Tell us a joke in the comments. 1 LOLZ
  • Re-blog this post, and tell us you did in the comments. 1 LOLZ
  • Tag a friend. 1 LOLZ

All rewards will be distributed via the drop bot in the comments so be sure to leave a comment even if you only reblogged the post and don't feel like telling a joke.

If we select your joke to include in the database, we will reward you with an additional 5 $LOLZ, and include you as the source for the joke (unless you prefer to be anonymous). Post as many jokes as you like, and earn an additional 5 $LOLZ for each joke selected for inclusion.

What We Are Looking For

Any joke can be posted and earn an $LOLZ, although we ask that you stay Safe For Work.

To be selected for inclusion in our database, your joke will need to be -

  • Clean. LOLZ is kid friendly. Please, no dirty, racial, or potty humor.
  • Short. We prefer jokes with short setups and punch lines.
  • Funny! Or at least Punny.

Your joke does not to be original. Any joke you know will do.

Lets get this party started!

Come on people... MAKE US LAUGH!

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About LOLZ Token

LOLZ is a Hive engagement token with the mission of spreading laughter and joy on the Hive blockchain. And while the LOLZ Project may have a sense of humor, it is no joke.

LOLZ is the world's first "Proof of Humor" token and is mined when LOLZ holders use the !LOL or !LOLZ command in comments to share a clean joke and tip the author a freshly minted LOLZ token.

Help Support the LOLZ Project

Here are a few ways you can help the LOLZ Project.

  • Use the !LOL and !LOLZ command often to tip fellow Hive authors.
  • If one of our jokes makes you smile, consider giving it an upvote! All rewards will be staked to help cover Resource Credit costs for the bot and increase curation value.
  • Follow @lolztoken and participate in our airdrops, contests, and giveaways.
  • Delegate or donate. Hey, we aren't too proud to beg. If you have some extra Hive power you can spare consider delegating it to @lolzbot, or use the link below to donate Hive.



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149 comments
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I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.

Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable.

Reblogged! !LOLZ

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I sent my girlfriend a 'Get Better' card.
She's not sick, or anything - I just think she can get better..

Credit: reddit
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @arpuch
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/10)

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!LOLZ We will accept both. !DROPLOLZ 5

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A taxi driver was getting flirty with a woman in a bar.
At the end of the night he took her back to her place.

Credit: reddit
@arpuch, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (11/10)

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I know you are looking for jokes in English. However, I think it would be a good idea to build a database with jokes in other languages, specially Spanish. There are tons of Hispanics from Latin America and Spain here in HIVE. For that reason, I'm going to suggest one joke in Spanish. If it doesn't do, I'm adding another one in English. So, first in Spanish: "¿Cuál es la fruta más risueña? ¡Pues la Naranja ja ja ja!". Now in English: "Why cats are so good in Videogames? Well, they have 9 lives!"

)

No? Oh, well... I tried. I already reblogged your post! Take a look @cjlugo and @urkanon! Thank you for this initiative!

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I was thinking the same thing. I love how words that sound exactly the same mean entirely different things in another language. I also would like to brush up on some simple Spanish jokes.

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Thanks for the suggestion. We are considering that for the future, but we will need some help since we don't speak Spanish we wouldn't be able to judge the jokes. And we will take the cat joke !LOLZ !DROPLOLZ 8

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Wow! Thank you so much! You are so generous! Well, I hope you can do it soon! I'm humbled for taking that joke. It's not mine, though! Let's say, it's some anonymous joke!

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When I was a kid, I said to my father one afternoon, ‘Daddy, will you take me to the zoo?’ He answered, ‘If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you.' - Jerry Lewis

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!LOLZ nice one! !DROPLOLZ 8

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Why are ghosts such bad liars?
Because you can see right through them!

Reblogged

!WINE
!PGM

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Sent 0.1 PGM tokens to @imno, @lolztoken

remaining commands 5

Buy and stake 10 PGM token to send 0.1 PGM per day,
100 PGM token to send 0.1 PGM three times per day
500 to send and receive 0.1 PGM five times per day
1000 to send and receive 0.1 PGM ten times per day

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Support the curation account @ pgm-curator with a delegation 10 HP - 50 HP - 100 HP - 500 HP - 1000 HP

Get votes from @ pgm-curator by paying in PGM, here is a guide

Create a HIVE account with PGM from our discord server, here is a guide

I'm a bot, if you want a hand ask @ zottone444

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There is a big shortage of nickels in the world, but I got all mine for five cents.

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How do you get a country girl’s attention? A tractor 😅

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This is the story of two grains of sand that arrive at the beach:
"Damn, it's crowded today ..."
Tag @gestion.alive
Reblogged
!LOLZ

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What’s the best part about teamwork?

Someone else to blame!

Reblogged and tagging @tfranzini

!LOLZ

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That is so true! !LOLZ !DROPLOLZ 8

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My girlfriend is absolutely beautiful. Body like a Greek statue – completely pale, no arms.

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Most of my life is spent avoiding conflict. I hardly ever visit Syria.

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My Dad said, always leave them wanting more. Ironically, that’s how he lost his job in disaster relief.

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My wife told me: ‘Sex is better on holiday.’ That wasn’t a nice postcard to receive.

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If you arrive fashionably late in Crocs, you’re just late.

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A fire hydrant has H-2-O on the inside and K-9-P on the outside.

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You know it is going to be a bad day when the letters in your alphabet soup spell D-I-S-A-S-T-E-R.

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Did you hear about the crook who stole a calendar? He got twelve months.

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I've just written a song about tortillas; actually, it’s more of a rap.

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The man who invented knock-knock jokes should get a no bell prize.

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If I got 50 cents for every failed math exam, I’d have $6.30 now.

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The man who survived both mustard gas and pepper spray is a seasoned veteran now.

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The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they always take things literally.

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Maybe if we start telling people their brain is an app, they’ll want to use it.

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What do kids play when their mom is using the phone? Bored games.

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Why are snails slow? Because they’re carrying a house on their back.

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Why did the soccer player take so long to eat dinner? Because he thought he couldn’t use his hands.

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What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter?
An irrelephant!

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Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Theodore.
Theodore who?
Theodore wasn’t opened so I knocked.

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Why did the orange lose the race?

It ran out of juice.

!LOL

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"Why don't vampires get involved with blockchain?

Proof-of-Stake terrifies them."

Thought this one up myself. Tagging @tanjakolader and also reblogged.

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That is awesome! !LOLZ !DROPLOLZ 7

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The word queue is ironic.
It's just q with a bunch of silent letters waiting in line.

Credit: reddit
@rarej, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/10)

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One of my favorite musical jokes:
Joke 1: What happens when you throw a piano down a mineshaft?
You get A-flat minor

Here's another:
Joke 2: Did you hear about the guy that invented the knock-knock joke?
He won a "no-bell" prize!

Be glad I didn't submit 10 of these (I actually thought about it...)
Joke 3: I told 10 different puns, hoping that at least one of them would win.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

Reblogged, @torran you should check this out, knock em dead

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Why dictator dosn't take it cryptocurrency?Because people take to it.
reblogged
target @ryoudo

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reblogged
have a look @noblesky
joke: A: "Knock, knock" B: "Who is there?" A:"Delivery" B: "What you deliver?" A: "Rihanna's new LP"

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