Self-help, survivor's guilt and imposter's syndrome - Day 76

Motto: What is the rewards you get for good work? More work. (Porky Pig)

Today I am thinking to talk about helping others, survivor's guilt and imposter's syndrome. What? Wait, why are all those things together? This is an interesting story, and every one of us had the mentioned experience in one way or another. So, let's begin!

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You are really good at something (see some of my previous posts about learning and mastering stuff here, here, and [here](Wind of change - Day 36)). Then, obviously, people will notice, and ask for help. There are two different approaches here, one being that you have no patience and you can do in 10 minutes something that others may do in days (months, even years). And you choose to do it to save time. Another option is that you can teach, and you choose to show them how to do it, how to learn faster and how to provide the right hints, the idea behing ''Give a man a fish and he will eat good for one day, teach him how to catch the fish and he will eat good for life''. Well, I may sound selfish, but some skills that I can learn in days can take other people at least weeks, to learn the basics, and that will require some good hours from me to explain to them and teach them all these stuff. Let's not even go there where some skills took me years of testing (reading the crypto-market tendencies) and some people want to learn this in weeks. You see where I go. Now, if I like you, chances are that I will teach you as much as you need to get a good start. But sometimes I lose patience. And if I need to teach 5 or 10 people in the same time, I will end up having no time for myself. (I got a strategy, so basically first I give you some hard work homework, in order to decide if you are interested trully, let's say you want to become financially independent, and my strategy is tested for 7-10 years in order to achieve that target. First I will give you two websites - and, 5 heavy books to read, like Tony Robbins - Money, master the game, and I will ask you to pay all your debts and save six times your monthly expenses, and only after you show me that you did most of it, I will start to work on you 1-to-1. This is kind of how I do it. I test people. I can be annoying sometimes. Yes, now and then people are doing everything and get there, ready to start. At that point I do my best to help you).

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The problem is much more complicated. First, being able to self help and do the work is very important. You need to know what you want and do the work. There is no magic secret to achieve success overning. Work is implied every time. There is no shortcut. And you need to understand that. Put in the hours, and it will be done.

Second, if you are really good at something and a lot of people ask for your help, you need to learn to say NO. If you don't like to look like an asshole, then do some automated process. For example, if more that 5 people ask me for something, like for example how to set up a Metamask account, I will write a post about it, with video or/and pictures, step by step, or I will look for a good one, and everytime somebody is asking it, I give them the link. That will usually help to jump-start it. Your time is important also, doesn't matter how entitled some people, even friends, may feel. Do not waste it. Do not feel guilty just because you mastered a skill and other don't. Tell them for the start how much it takes, and ask them if they want to learn it for example working on it one year, or three, or five. If they say is too much, stop right there.

And third, know your own value. do not do free work, for anyone. Bartering may be a good idea. You take me out in the wild and show me how to put my tent and survive the night, and I can teach you how to make the best rissotto ever. Do not sell yourself shortly. Alternatively, you can make a blog post, a series of article, or even a book, and direct everyone there, in order to save time. (For example, if you need to train more and learn how to remember almost everything, then this book will help you - yeah, I know!). Knowing what is your worth it is important. Being humble is good, but always, always, you should know your strong skills and abilities.

What do you think about it?

All the best, George

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