As A Social Middleman

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Humans, as social beings, are always and will be in constant interaction with one another. It is a natural character we possess so it is not an optional thing to do or engage in. During these interactions, there are times when our intentions could get opposed or not totally accepted. Those times are where conflicts arise. However, conflicts need not degenerate into a wildfire if properly handled. But it is bound to happen and as such shows that we are growing and not stagnant people. Even, on one hand, I think the world will definitely be a boring place to live if we all agree with one another every time, conflicts could be spice-up per time.

Most times, warring parties could believe they are right in their own worlds, hence the need for someone to come in the middle, mediate and resolve the issue. Naturally, I do steer clear of public quarrels due to some unfortunate incidents that happen but more importantly, the ardent warning from my parents. So, I am mostly involved in minor conflicts.

I remember when I got into the university, I lived off-campus and in my hostel, there were 2 other freshers apart from my roommate. And the two are both females and roommates. In a flash, we all bonded and we have been friends with one another since then.
There was this time I (and my roommate) was a mediator between those ladies in question. Isn’t it funny that two roommates were keeping malice with each other? And it was not quite visible that I and my roommate noticed. Well, I am not sure whether the other occupants of the hostel knew but we noticed somehow. I, for sure, can read people from their looks and actions. I told my roommate and we did a private investigation on it jokingly asking each of them separately and at different times. And we knew it! So, the next thing was how to make sure both of them were available at the same time to solve the issue.

I knew I did not want them to know what we were planning so we worked behind the shadows. It was not easy to make sure they were together because we noticed that when one was in their room, the other will surely find somewhere else to go, maybe to our room or just a place. But as the universe would have it, we were able to get them together in their room and my other guy manned the door – no one was to leave until it is done.

The issue was actually about finances, I think for the kitchen precisely – foodstuffs and cooking gas refill. One of them honestly was quite broke but the other was not having it as she had been things available for both of them. So, I guess she grew tired. That is definitely understandable. I and my friend took turns addressing each of the ladies' side of the argument. I remember we did that in a friendly manner, in fact with sections of jokes in between – my guy was very good at that. I remember I noted some things to them that since the bills were being one-sided now, they should, basically, just try to minimize expenses like instead of a full cooking gas refill, half should do. Other things like the option of reasoning with each other which was by no means a small thing.

Our other friend who was having some financial issues at that point too was advised not to be depressed by it and also to look for other avenues for cash inflow. Finally, we told them to look at us (I and my roommate) as a good example😎. And is it a ladies’ thing to always have issues with themselves... because that of guys are things I seldom hear? Or is it just me?

We were able to resolve the whole issue and everyone was happy. Like I said earlier, these things are naturally bound to happen but it is the way it is handled that determines the result in the end.


This is my entry for the Hive Learners week 29 edition 1 topic which you can check out here.



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10 comments
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We, as mediators of a conflict, in addition to being impartial, must provide solutions for this conflict to end.
Thanks for your sharing.

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(Edited)

Exactly, a mediation without an end goal of totally resolving an issue has failed already.
Thank you, @ricestrela, for your input.

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Yes, it is a great truth. Thank you for your words.

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That's true bro, as human being during the course of our interactions there will be frictions, how we manage such situations tells alot

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Yes, even more frictions when case has been made to resolve it. That is why mediators need be at least be a good communicator and try staying neutral so as to settle it well and fair.

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Guys always flow easily with one another compared to ladies. But not all guys though. I like that you tried to resolve conflicts among these two ladies. Shows you and your guy cares about them.

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Guys always flow easily with one another compared to ladies. But not all guys though.

Honestly! But still the percentage of guys is way more. I believe that scenario was a privilege for us all to grow. And they were our friends since first year so we could not let that slide at all.

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Wise my guy... really wise

.when ladies tend to have conflicts among themselves it takes a well calculated intervention to settle the whole issue...but then it's not limited to females or friends...even married couples and close siblings always find themselves disagreeing... sometimes a lack of communication comes into play or even pride...it takes someone more experienced to handle the situation and you and your friend did really great ❤️❤️🔥

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Very well, that is why mediation between warring parties is not for everybody. Infact, when it comes to bigger issues like that involving nations, the mediators are professionals who have gone to study about it in higher institutions.

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Very true bro...if any how person tries to settle a bout like that...it might get worse

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