No Man's Land

Ah, but life is like that! It does not permit you to arrange and order it as you will. It will not permit you to escape emotion, to live by intellect and reason! You can not say, 'i will feel so much and no more.' Life, MR. Welman, whatever else it is, is not reasonable.
-Poirot

Nothing could be perceived as more superficial than philosophy in mystery thrillers! But here is Poirot, who keeps doing it on a daily basis! I think most people might chuckle behind my back when I say this, but Poirot and Christie have been my go-to to quench my thirst for philosophy for quite a long time!

I am 24 years old, and still, I watch Tom and Jerry when my mind is not in the right place! How Yoda helped young master luke skywalker, this iconic cat and mouse duo has done no less than that for me in retrospect!

There is a famous saying in Hindi, bidhata jab deta hai, tab chappar phadke deta hai. And that is what was happening to my two trading accounts for the past few days! As two of my most beloved individuals had advised me to build a nest egg, I started collecting the hay for a solid base! Everything was going very well! A solid trading cap for my accounts started formulating! And life never looked so good! But that proverb is abridged! The rest goes as jab leta hai, tab kaccha bhi le leta hae!

When the seemingly unstoppable crash began last night, I made a few mistakes. Well, it is not a crash per se, but to me, it feels like one for some reason. I became incessantly greedy as every one of my trades prior to the crash started bearing fruit. I became impatient and too impulsive as my profits had started staking up! And I became shortsighted and lost focus on my strategy, not selling too early! As BTC's recent rally was a parabolic rise, a market readjustment was only a matter of time! And as dada had said, BTC readjusting to 40k is entirely normal!

But the thing is, i don't have any BTC now. All of what I had, I traded in unpredictable alts which due to my lack of enough knowledge on market TA looks as if they have their own mind! Those coins drop and rise quite parallel with BTC, but in such an unprecedented manner that it is scary sometimes. And so my strategy gaya var me, and the most losses I took was from transaction fees! Like a girl who rips out flower petals while thinking, "he loves me, he loves me not," I did with tokens. "It will rally, it will not!" and just bought and sold, bought and sold. Tried to scalp on a downtrend, and the rest became history!

When I understood that my trades were becoming a moronic gamble instead of calculated risk, by then, it was too late. What I have worked for and collected over the past month, almost half of it went away in one night! But luckily, I still have my trading capital intact! Well, I am kind of even in profit! Oh, what the hell? I will be lying if I say I still am not in a better position! But when the PNL drops like that, it looks as if your money fading away does not! And a bit of artificial grieving always gives a shitpost an aesthetic buzz, if one had to say!

So herr i am, once again resorting to Tom and Jerry and Poirot for salvation, with a self-promise of not looking at the charts for at least the next 12 hours! And a lesson for me in all this i think is to be like Tom. However much I turn abusive or be abused, I always have to love my jerry! For he is who gives Tom a purpose in life after all!