First off, I'd like to say that most traffic exchange owners do a good job at keeping members interested and continually coming back to surf and promote. There is also a small number of exceptional owners that exceed that and have truely dedicated members because of the quality of service.
We also have the owners that send out emails once in a while that aren't geared toward their traffic echange, but to mostly send something that wants your attention focused elsewhere which doesn't make much sense. WHY would you not want members coming to your own site? Why not put that email to good use to boost your site's activity AND have a better chance of a member making a purchase? Focus on keeping YOUR BUSINESS alive and not somebody elses.
Next are the owners that do practically nothing and for some reason wonder why nobody is surfing or promoting their traffic exchange. It's not the member's responsibility to continually show up just because you own an exchange. It's your job to give them reasons to. YOU need to promote like you're the only one, because you just might be! If you're one of the top three or four surfers at your own exchange with 130-150 page views, then you're definately doing something wrong and I don't mean surf more. Put that effort into an ACTIVE exchange, do promos at Promoslice and add VTG. Maybe even take the time to learn a thing or three at Click Track Profit.
I'd also like to say that some owners send out emails, but neglect to even send a link for members to go log in. That link should be a standard thing to include. It also wouldn't hurt to customize and personalize your email templates. Some little changes can make a big difference in what someone decides what to do with your message.