'Kiosk Coffee Bar' - NOT a Tasteem Review

It's been over a year since I took these photographs. During February 2020 just before the national lockdown, we were in the Manchester Arndale (a large indoor shipping centre) and in need of some coffee.

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Kiosk’ is one of those temporary places they stick right in the middle of a large open space. They are kind of semi-permanent and maybe the rent is a little cheaper.

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Having decided to give the Coffee and Pastry for £4.25 deal a go, we both went for the Cappuccino with a Raspberry & Vanilla Danish plus Almond Croissant for the pasties.

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Service was a little slow and despite the Manchester Arndale centre being busy, we noticed the lack of patrons around us.

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…’maybe this was a bad move, and we should have stuck to the boring but predictable Costa?’…

Two girls in their early twenties were running Kiosk. They looked like ex-university graduates, well-educated but I guessed had little idea of the big wide world.

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I could not fault them for their décor, though the focus on ‘Vegan’ this and ‘Vegan' that, was a little over-pronounced.

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I don’t expect pork buns or even slices of fresh cow on my pastry and could see the ‘arty style' they were trying to impose.

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We waited a little longer than expected and were finally presented with these. A little on the dusty side I thought?

My first swig of this supposed coffee, hiding somewhere under a deep film of chocolate (or whatever it was) didn't resonate well.

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This is not hot enough’, I spluttered to @bingbabe almost choking on the thick dust.

Picking up my cup I approached one of the ex-graduates and requested her to make my coffee ‘extra hot’.

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Oh we can’t do that, it will destroy the delicate ingredients in there”, she said while manicuring her nails with some pointy instrument.

Just heat it up, I DON’T CARE”, I said getting increasingly agitated.

Well… we can make it a little hotter”, said ex-grad reluctantly seemingly oblivious to my growing frustration.

This was not getting any easier

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I nodded and was presented a few minutes later with the same cup of coffee around one degree warmer.

Oh for fuck sake, let’s drink these dumb designer coffees and get out of here”, I said to @bingbabe a little too loudly.

Both ex-grads looked over at us in disapproval; I tried hard but failed to supress a sneaky smirk.

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One large slurp and it was gone. The Danish pasty was as good as it looked and I received no notable feedback about the Almond Croissant.

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We won’t be going back, but I doubt 'Kiosk' will be there once the stores open again in April.

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If you found this article so invigorating that you are now a positively googly-eyed, drooling lunatic with dripping saliva or even if you liked it just a bit, then please upvote, comment, rehive, engage me or all of these things.



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23 comments
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Oh, I do hate it when you ask for it a certain way and they decide that they know best!!!!

I do like the sound of a dirty chai though!!

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'the dirty chai', I haven't tried one.. but like the regular stuff. That dusty stuff made me cough.., we can't cough now as everyone runs away screaming 'COVID!'.

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It did look very dusty!

I hate that paranoia, sometimes when I wear a mask it makes me prone to coughing which doesn't go down well in a supermarket!

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I do say to @bingbabe, should I start a coughing fit, such as 'cough, cough, damn covid, cough, c-19 fuck off, cough, cough', just to see what happens.., but she won't let me.. and I might get arrested... !WINE

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So you're saying you ordered two dairy-free coffees and a gluten free danish minus the butter?

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Christ knows the intricate details.., it was a year ago. You know the negatives remain lodged in our brains for far longer than the positives! This is why I take all these pictures, it helps me remember what happened. !WINE

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That’s what happens when the caff is “woke”, seriously can’t beat a greasey spoon, lots of dead animal on the plate, fried bread oozing oil when bitten, baked beans and tinned tomatoes, slathered in HP sauce.
Oh lord, save me from the cult of vegan

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I make my coffee at home, and then stick it in the microwave for a minute. Now, that's proper hot coffee!

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😂
Lips like a trout pout

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It must be tough competing with the big chains. I will often go for the independent, but then you take your chances on the quality. Depends on their experience and dedication. Maybe these put too much emphasis on the luck. I think there is more demand for vegan stuff now, so that could be a selling point for them if they can get people to come back. Obviously the last year will kill off a lot of such businesses. It will be a while before some people feel safe mixing with crowds again.

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I like the indies, but right now its Starbucks or Costa as I don't go into towns where they live (as nothing else is open). !WINE

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Love your Foodie post!

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Those pastry's look like they were just mass produced and put on display. I bet they just buy them all packaged up and unpackage them to sell. Not like you would find from an actual bakery. Unless it comes from the actual food court or it is cookies or something, I don't trust much mall kiosk food. I don't really even go to the mall that much anymore honestly.

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Oh nooo, they call that coffee?!?! I was trying to see what on earth was in that pic, really would not have been charmed by choc powder on my coffee! The only way they could have survived was if daddy kept the business alive by throwing more and more money away.
I have fortunately not had many disappointments supporting new little businesses before, just sad to wonder what happened to them during our hard lockdowns!

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The only way they could have survived was if daddy kept the business alive by throwing more and more money away.

I was thinking the same thing myself! !WINE

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Thanks for continuing to make Hive awesome.

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