Many times in this ever-changing world that demands an increasingly hectic pace of life, we tend to carry out activities that place us in situations in which both our emotional and sentimental stability are put at risk.
That is why we must maintain a perfect balance between our beliefs and the reality that surrounds us. However, this seems very easy on paper, but very difficult to achieve in real life.
For this there is a tool called equanimity, which is the virtue that allows us to keep our way of feeling balanced, and in a stable way. We do this regardless of the situations that may arise throughout the day.
This includes the actions of other people and isolated events, this virtue helps us to even maintain patience when what we want is not fulfilled when we want it, thus avoiding anxiety and many other characteristics that we have.
This also helps us combat fatigue and discouragement, since when they make an appearance in our lives, they make life experiences difficult for us in some way, during our daily performance, or at home, work or with our relationships. social.
In this time of great intensity, due to isolation and other social factors; People can experience some bipolar attacks, in which they can suddenly go from a great euphoria and in a matter of minutes or hours go to a depressive state, it is necessary that we put these types of tools into practice.
Emotions depend on many factors that can alter or distort them, this can be due to biochemical or hormonal factors in our bodies, or due to unexpected circumstances in our lives, either due to accidents, or carelessness on the part of someone else, or they can even be due to the environment, such as the weather.
And it is that, in terms of emotionality, life is a bit complex, since the stimuli and responses. This makes it very difficult for our emotions to remain stable.
Obviously there are people who, if they achieve emotional stability, but they do so in a negative way, since they are always in a bad mood, very irritable or even reacting explosively to others. Or they may even be habitually sad or homesick.
Equanimity responds to the need of individuals to achieve permanent inner peace, since when some type of event that represents a challenge occurs, then we must reflect calmly and in this way obtain some type of response that allows us to improve the situation or accept it, and thus continue with our life.
Equanimity consists a lot in avoiding being emotionally dependent on the situation that is causing us some kind of discomfort, it seeks that we get a quick way out of those harmful emotions and thus achieve assertive responses
If we do not achieve this, then most likely we can fall into dramatic situations, in which we will exaggerate what we are experiencing and create a kind of drama, thus creating a vicious circle of frustration, which exacerbates the situation.
Once the situation arises we can implement this tool, either immediately, early or delayed, since due to the nature of the event it can take us by surprise and make our behavior very impulsive, however, it is necessary that later we take charge of what we are living so that this does not turn into something worse
If we cannot carry out this type of assertive behavior, we can bring two possible situations into our lives. In one of them, you may have to accept the situation in a negative way, pretending that nothing has happened, and ignore the situation; but this is actually sought by deceiving ourselves and the experience remains stored in our mind and can contaminate or distort our successive experiences, resulting in the fact that when similar or equal situations occur, they accumulate with those previously experienced and make us explode from some way or that they cause us some kind of disease.
At the other extreme, we can react explosively, this means that if it is in the case of an experience that generates sadness we could get to live a total drama, but if it is an experience that generates anger; we can do or say things that hurt others.
This is not only about releasing emotions, but also about taking charge of situations, because, if the latter is not fulfilled, the only thing that is achieved is emotional instability, in which, we become more susceptible and vulnerable to negative stimuli.
This is a work of perseverance, which will help us overcome adversity, complete tasks, take charge of our lives, but in a habitual way; And this does not have to do only with extraordinary circumstances, but to anticipate them.
Equanimity, part of the basic principle that all problems are a kind of mirage created by the brain that is based on the duality in which we live. These depend on our desires and aversions. Basically the problem does not have much power, it all depends on the way in which we decide to face it. It is the balance we have in a given situation that determines our reaction to it.
An example of this is when we issue some type of comment and it is well accepted by a certain part of our audience, but it is offensive or useless for another part of it. In both cases the feedback will be carried out, but in one of them we will obtain satisfactory results and in the other, comments that are destructive.
Equanimity consists of knowing how to accept both parties with the same maturity, so that with positive comments we do not raise our ego too much, and with negative comments we do not get depressed or generate some kind of anger.
We just have to think about any problem we have, and look for the root of it. There we can realize that the problems are generated because we always give them a qualifier or a value judgment, instead of simply seeing it as it is.
When we generate judgments in situations, we take them to the extreme of duality and that is when the qualifiers "good" or "bad" are generated.
A practical example of equanimity is to visualize a mirror, since it never clings to anything, much less emits qualifications about what is good or bad. Much less reject or accept what is in front of him.
The mirrors simply receive a stimulus and reflect what is, without ever making judgments. In these, an infinite amount of images are constantly reflected, but it remains intact, and unperturbed by them.
The mirror never qualifies if something is tall or short, fat or skinny, good or bad, and this happens because this object does not have any kind of expectations, it only reflects objectively.
The judgments we make in any situation is a reaction to what we have in our mind, it is a conditioning that makes what we see in the mirror take a shape.
In this case, our mind is the one that works as any type of filter that allows us to distort reality and then take situations to one of the extremes of duality.
We must realize that normally in our daily life we carry out actions that are neither good nor bad, and we do them without judging them; Just like breathing, we never judge the breath we inhale as good or the one we exhale as bad, they are simply part of a process.
Likewise, we must take these attitudes with our triumphs and failures, since just as the mirror does not do it, we must never judge the one who raises his arms in triumph as the one who cries for a failure. Perhaps the root of all these judgments comes given that in many cases our perception is that life is good and death is bad; however, this is like night and day.
Equanimity tries to give a fair value to everything we feel; since many times we can feel admiration for our enemies and rejection of certain attitudes of our friends, however, we repress them to prevent our perceptions about these cases from totally changing in us.
In equanimity, one never seeks to ignore what happens at a certain moment; much less prevent the person from having goals, much less stop planning or stop having purposes for a certain amount of time.
What is sought is to act consciously, instead of reacting automatically and impulsively as a result of the beliefs that are in our subconscious. This is about observing, feeling and seeing things in the objective way that they are, just as a mirror does.
In this way we avoid generating certain desires that can be harmful in our life, since these can bring with them aversion or in the worst case some kind of obsession.
Equanimity is based on the principle that problems as such do not exist, we are simply ourselves, who through our beliefs turn them into problems and in turn give them power.
Many times when we receive some kind of comments or criticism that hurt our sensitivity in one way or another, we tend to mark the person who made the comment as a kind of adversary, but if we take the time to realize that we do not own the absolute truth and that this person is giving us a point of view that is generated thanks to a different life experience, then we can evolve much faster.
Among the keys we have to understand equanimity we list:
Never depend on anything or anyone
Develop patience, since many of the habits that we dislike tend to go away with time; We just have to witness the process, like the example of the caterpillar and the chrysalis,
Accept ourselves as we are, leaving aside the guilt and mistakes of the past; since only we can change our reality. We must apply a minimum of 10 minutes to meditate, connect with our inner peace.
Disidentify ourselves, from things, to be able to see them as alien and thus develop a more objective vision, in this way we can evaluate the situation from the outside
We must also practice detachment, this means that we can enjoy everything, but without holding on to it. Understanding that both pleasure and suffering are transitory
We must have a good philosophy of life, that is, a purpose to which we want to address
Something that is important to mention is that we should never confuse emotional stability with stagnation because many times it happens that people get discouraged very quickly and last so long that they end up being disappointed; which leads them to a state of permanent depression.
It is common to see that many people take a passive attitude towards life, this type of people prefer not to intrude between the situations that are experienced in daily life, simply for the fear of experiencing some form of disappointment that could damage their state of mind, However, this should not be confused with equanimity, since this simply represents a fear of feeling certain stimuli and at no time is the situation faced objectively. In these cases, people take an attitude of survival that goes beyond the life experience that is sought, and for this reason they live in a permanent state of secrecy.
This type of defense mechanism seeks that we are always on the defensive and we are not doing anything that is remarkable or of value, thus seeking an attitude and a way of acting among this type of people like those of an undead.
And as I commented in the title, it would be great if you bring a different point of view to this, you have to be more than clear that a conversation between two people, when only one of them speaks, is totally boring, I do not ask you to vote like maybe others, I want to talk ...
Participation in the @calumam contest last week, I let my fingers rest, and now they want to step on the keys on my computer. And you can help me with that!
Come on, do your best!