Personal Finance: What Do You Make Of Breadwinning Responsibilities?
As a part-time breadwinner, I've lived a life of sacrifice and majorly bought things I need and not really things I'd want. In life, there are times we try to buy what we desire, not because we 100% need them but because having them might give us a validation of pleasure since we worked for them. There are times we question our expenses and we cannot understand why they become unreasonable sometimes, but the truth is, the reasons why we cannot explain our expenses is because there are times we sentimentally spend to attain gratification or fulfillment for the efforts we've put in. I use to remember working a job about 4 years ago.
When it's the end of the month, I spend a sizeable amount of money buying luxury goods, just because I like them and not necessarily because I'd need them, this didn't mean I was a spendthrift, I did that because I felt, I worked for the money and I shouldn't be buying only the things I need as I might lose motivation to work in the long run if I'm only taking care of the needs of others and buying only things that I need. I became a breadwinner as early as 23, it's more about working to fulfill the goals and needs of others and partially trying to narrow down your finances to suit your expenses too.
Celebrating a birthday is one of those things I've never done, while I make excuses that birthdays are childish, I think the major reason why I don't celebrate them is that spending on them would be a luxury. Now there are things we can generally afford, but sometimes affordability is dependent on others things we desperately need to spend on. Now spending on a low-cost birthday party might be within my means, but I wouldn't and the reason is that I'll have to forgo taking care of other aspects of my financial responsibilities which might suffer and bring certain consequences. One of the luxury rich people have is the ability to take care of their needs, their desires, and their wants, including their excesses.
Now a person can be earning fairly well and still live a miserable life, unable to actually take care of their wants. On the surface, the records are there to show they're earning fairly well, but it's hardly reflecting their standard of living. Sometimes the standards of living of these people might be Inexplicable, but most times when we cannot spend the money we've earned, it only means there are far bigger responsibilities into which we're sentimentally keyed into and the consequences of foreclosure might just be dire. However, life's unfair and sometimes people are caught in an unpleasant situation where they have to be providers whether they're earning well or not.
However, there's no shame in being at the receiving end of unfair financial situations, it simply means the odds to be unlucky are quite high and this is why we must make efforts to change things. So sometimes we try to validate our financial inadequacies by saying they're not really relevant, but some of the things we consider financially irrelevant are actually what we would spend on only if we're not channeling the resources we have elsewhere. Whether one's a part-time breadwinner or full-time, the difference is that people who are breadwinners understand the art of management and sacrifice as well.
I've had a lot of people complaining of financial inadequacies, but one of the most painful things about money is making it and spending it on others and having little or no percentage for yourself, but then people who choose to be responsible would create a validation for the breadwinning duties. I may remain a breadwinner for life, as I've simply accepted the fact that there are sociocultural responsibilities one cannot avoid. In Africa, the entitlement mindset is more rampant and because of familial ties, sometimes we succumb to entitlement cultures even if it's not something we'd want. The only way to live like this is to create that perfect scenario to spend on what you want even if it is at the expense of the commitments you'd majorly favor.
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It is well. Remember when my first salary came and I told my mum. She asked if I remember I have junior siblings. Things we do for family
Hahaha things we exactly do for family, so how did you do? Did you split the salary?
Yea, had to send my mum some money
That's kind of you though, being committed isn't easy.
Yea, but you gotta do it
The breadwinner responsibility can be draining and set one back from achieving personal goals but with family involve it becomes a very tough situation. My nephew was asking me for money yesterday, I had to tell him I can't help anyone now as I am in need of help myself with employment for the whole year.
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I agree with you on this that the entitlement culture in Africa as make so many life difficult, sometimes I wish I am not responsible for the I do for my families, I just wish I take care of myself alone but I'm trying my best as a man, what we do for people we love .
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Sometimes this entitlement culture is probably why we hardly grow to the heights we'd want. In Nigeria, I think its even worse. When you explain to people that you don't have, they term you stingy.
Omo, it's not easy to be a bread winner of the family ooo, especially if it is just you alone and no other assistance from anywhere..
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Sometimes, the pleasures we seek are not even ones that take our money...but our time. Imagine making a salary and just burning your time watching movies all day without thinking about what to do with the money that will help you and those around you. It is equally as useless as buying shoes and ice cream.