Samson and Dadila of the 20th century

in The Ink Well2 months ago (edited)


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These creatures of the omnipotent creator, this is the story of David and Mary, which in our present time represents the ancient life of Samson and Dadila, well David was an athlete who liked to be the first in everything and had a huge strength and Mary was the typical beautiful young woman like a porcelain doll, who played with men as their trophy, the interesting thing is that these two young people meet at the same university, David takes the career as an economist and Mary takes the career as a social communicator and journalism, he liked to be the center of attraction.


Thus began the college days David got his scholarship for sport for his athletic prowess and Maria an academic scholarship, at the time of sharing at a party they met and it was a night of love at first sight for David, when he saw Maria, but Maria was self-centered saw him as a single trophy as others, until the.point that made a bet with her friend that she became his girlfriend and then voted him in a few months. Thus begins the game of Mary for the conquest of his Samson, over time he noticed that the young woman wanted him, he did anything to surprise her, but this pretty woman ignored him, the young athlete had to do something to surprise her.


Until a time came when it was fulfilled to be together on a date between the two, there was only one detail that only David was in love, since Mary was only a bet and could do whatever he wanted with him, the young Mary began dating David, he proposed a challenge to see that she was a worthy bride to be by his side, he proposed that he had to win all sports activities and that she was going to be hers forever. The young David accepted the challenge, but he did not know what price he would have to pay for an unrequited love, the days passed and David began his journey of sports to get his great love.


Davi began to win all his competition and managed to win the love of Mary, but did not know what was the part of it, she bends accepts, but it was a false love this asks him what was his secret of being a winner, David did not pay attention only life with the eyes of love, so spend several days and Mary returns to demand new challenges until you get to the Olympics, Davi managed to get it. It was crazy, but began to consume steroids to reach that goal, Mary laughed in front of her friend of everything she could do with David as a toy.


They arrive el.llegan the.moment David got a silver medal ennlas Olympics and when he arrives is going to give it to his beloved Maria, but this receives it as anyone and tells him that the gold medal is for the winners and the silver was just as loser, could not be with someone like that, ends with the and londeja voted, Maria meets with her friends tells him that he fulfilled his bet and wins him the. David realized what had happened and told her, but it was useless, he had already made fun of her, Davia walked away but was sanctioned from the university team for steroid abuse, the saddest part of the case that had its side effects, his health began to fail, he began to go blind and suffering from diabetes, he still had his strong body, but he could no longer play sports. For Maria got a great job in a television channel, with unforgettable cost, the owner wanted to sleep with her, but she does not want that and tries to leave, tries to join, as can ask for help to one of her friend, the friend runs where David is to tell him what happened, but he did not come, he asks her to take him to save her, so it happened.


Thanks to the arrival of Maria's friend David, he manages to enter and hears Maria's voice crying, but five more men are waiting for him and he is seriously wounded, but he never gives up, as he can he manages to blindly beat the five men, I thought. The owner arrives and they shoot him, but he is saved because Mary enters so that he does not hurt his beloved, he runs out asking for help, when David realizes that his beloved is looking for help he kneels down and asks God to give him one last time his sight and his strength to see who that man of evil was, and his wish is granted, when he manages to see the owner with the gun, He shoots and does not stop, he is a beast, as he can, he takes the gun away from him, with rage he moves one of the pillars and the whole floor falls on top of him, and as he can, he tries to get out, Maria sees him leaving the place, but he is wounded and faints in her arms, thanks that she manages to ask for help she manages to save her hero, she marries him and spends the rest of her life with him, no matter what.


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Hello @newton666,
We have a strict rule in the Ink Well community: no abuse of women or girls, and no violence against women or girls. In this story, obviously, Mary suffers more than one act of violence.

I appreciate that this story took time and that you thought the plot through thoroughly. If you could manage to tell the story without including violence against women, that would be acceptable.

Also, in the fifth paragraph, there are a few words in Spanish. You probably don't want that included.

Good luck!

I have already corrected the last paragraph and thank you very much.

Ready, change the end of Maria and the correction of the paragraph.

Thank you for that, and for observing the rules of the community. I've read the story again and commented.

Have the most peaceful day!

The characters of Mary and David have arcs that show significant development. Paralleling the narrative with the well-known story of David and Delilah is a clever technique. In the end, there is a resolution that readers find satisfying.

Thank you for posting this story in the Ink Well community.

(There are significant translation issues which are difficult for you to control but they do interfere with the readability of the story. If you can get someone to read it over before publishing that might be helpful. We at Ink Well appreciate the challenge and the effort it takes to meet that challenge.)

Hello @newton666,
Thank you for changing that story. Please stay away from themes that feature rape, abuse, violence against women/girls in the future. There is so much to write about in the world and in your imagination. I know you can find wonderful ideas outside of these topics.

I think it's very clever that you used an ancient, well-known story as a model for yours. So much of what we see and read is inspired by something someone wrote hundreds, or even thousands of years ago.

I left you a tip as a small token of the work you put into this story.

Keep writing!