Arrogance? Humble? Which Do You Choose?

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(Edited)

They say arrogance is not good, they say arrogance is harmful and it blinds you. They say you must be humble. They also say that arrogance weakens you. But does it really?


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In a sense yes, it is harmful. The very definition and so many celebrated quotes do scream out the fact that arrogance is undesirable and being humble is the right way. And then being too humble and taken for granted doesn't really give you a pleasant feeling, now does it? That makes you feel sore.

Your modesty and humble nature shouldn't be unacknowledged. No one should make you feel down about yourself. If you ask me, I'm quite arrogant, have held a high opinion about myself for as long as I remember, also I remember having self-doubt. Yes, I still doubt my capabilities, but this arrogance mixed in with a sense of humor hides this fact. I will not say that it's comforting to share or admit these traits that I have but there you go, I did it.


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I had a college professor who used to say "Arrogance is good. It makes others feel intimidated by you and they can't take advantage of your good nature." This is completely opposite of what I have read about, and that too came from my college professor. I guess he was referring to a healthy balance of ego and confidence that can boost your outer profile. I'm sure if I ask him today, he'll have the same answer. "Be humble, but never let anyone treat you like a doormat" said a senior friend of mine. So even though I would read that arrogance isn't right at all, in real life, I got different opinions from people about it.

We can talk about who quoted what and if we should be arrogant or not, but the conclusion is nothing. Only you know what you should have. Although arrogance can provide an outer image of high self-opinion it can also make people think you're oafish.

Even Tiresias felt rage due to the blinding arrogance that Oedipus had, he said

Since you have chosen to insult my blindness—
You have your eyesight, and you do not see
How miserable you are, or where you live,
Or who it is who shares your household.


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And then again being nice all the time and not being treated in kind can lead to depression. It is often suggested that you should learn to say NO but why? Just so that you no longer feel down. "Rub you the wrong way" even sounds so bad.

Tip the scale to the right, then tip it left, make sure both sides amount to the same, the arrogance and gentleness, is a recipe I described! That's up to you to sort out, not every cook will make the same dish taste the same, what's best for you is something I can only advise, but I can be wrong too.


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7 comments
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Arrogance is bad It's confidence that is the key. Confidence is another form of arrogance however its the grit and determination without brining others down in the process. Confidence builds yourself and others around you as you lead the way and make calls to action. For me confidence in anything you do is critical but also keeping an open mind and being self aware go hand in hand with it. Arrogance is having that confidence but being dumb and having no other view points.

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That is what I was going to say... 😅
Ok, maybe not phrased as you did @bitcoinflood, but I was going to say that a positive self-esteem and self-image is what will protect you from people using you as a doormat. You can be humble and still have a good sense of self-esteem. Hold your head up high, without making others feel like less than you are.

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I agree with both of you... I think my professor and my senior friend were both saying the same thing... and I also believe that we often tip the scales differently and one start weighing more than the other... then we compensate it... how we do it is where things get a tad complicated

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I recognize what you are saying. It's indeed hard to find the balance, but I think that with time and practice it'll get "easier". I may be wrong though haha, but let's do this and see along the way 😅

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I think it is a big mistake to confuse arrogance with high self-esteem or better said (healthy), because many times arrogance can be the weapon of someone who is afraid of being hurt. I think that people who have a healthy self-esteem (not believing themselves better or worse than someone just because they have different abilities) are not arrogant. The true balance would be to be at peace with yourself and transmit that peace to other people without the need to be violent or violated. But that is not achieved if you are not at peace with yourself

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