Am I not human too?
When did getting angry over hurtful words or action become a bad thing, when has voiced out your hurts or pain to the person who caused it to become sin. In as much as I have my good side, I also have my bad side so you love me because I show my good side but all my names and judge me over my bad side. Isn't that interesting?
You get made over what I did wrong and let me know, and I see my wrongs and apologize, and then I get angry over your hurting words and actions and you see me as the bad guy, you judge me and think I am been too over paranoid about it.
Where has the consciousness of men gone to that they don't seem to think about the feelings of others or at least put into consideration others' feelings before killing them with their actions and words just because they decided to tell them their hurts?
I don't get it, we all have our bad side and I don't see where and when getting angry and letting someone know how you feel becomes a sin. Because a person decides to voice out her opinion over wrong deeds she doesn't like makes them evil.
I know you might be thinking that I am just being paranoid, maybe I am, maybe I am not but notwithstanding, I guess I am trying to make a point. I don't know why I decided to write this here today, maybe because I am pained or because I just feel like ranting out but whichever way, you can decide to stop and read or move to the next article but whatever the case, I am still going to write this after all.
A few days ago, a friend of mine said something which doesn't sit well with me and I had to let him know how I felt over what he said considering that we were friends, but as much as I tried to let him see where he went all wrong, he just wouldn't have it and before I knew, things were escalating and he was throwing bad words at me.
You know, because he is my friend, I didn't take it hard because we are friends but after waiting and realizing that he was not going to stop, and I didn't want to exchange vulgar words with him. You know our words can either mare or destroy people, I wouldn't want our friendship to be destroyed because of my words and you know, even though we will later settle our differences and forgive each other, and move on our words will always linger in our heart.
So, I decided to do what's best by keeping quiet but as much as I tried to keep shut and let him do the talk, I was becoming angry with his use of words, and since he wasn't ready to stop talking, and I didn't want to talk back before I said what's wrong, I decided to do the only thing that came to my mind and that was to block him.
Blocking him did not stop him from being my friend, it only stopped me from seeing his words which were making me angry and making me lose my temper to retaliate by replying to him badly and with bad words. I was angry but I wasn't ready to let my anger get in the way of my friendship with this person, maybe if it was someone else, I would have replied to them the same way the person was talking to me but this is my close paddy we are talking about here.
So, a friend was aware of the issue and asked me about it, I told him, about what happened and how I had refused to retaliate but blocked him because I didn't want to insult him and what I got from this friend shocked me to my marrow. According to her words, she said I should have tried to play cold, I went too far by blocking him and I should learn to understand people.
Why should I be the one understanding someone who is throwing vulgar words at me, why should I be the one to sit cold and watch someone else insult me, why should I not react towards the hurtful words of someone.
Imagine how I became a bad person because I voiced out my hurt and did what I should have done to avoid more problems. I became a bad person for refusing to let anyone step on my toes over an issue that isn't my fault and I became the bad person.
I don't know why people make it look as though it is wrong for one to express their hurt. Why would you feel hurt that someone decides to tell you or show how you hurt them so badly. When has telling you how much you hurt me become a crime?
I ask, am I not human? Don't I have blood flowing in my veins just as you have? I get hurt too, just the same way you get hurt, and should be able to express my feelings because I am human.